Kathleen Madigan (photo by Brian Friedman)

Comedian  Kathleen Magidan, a veteran of all the top TV talk shows, as well as USO tours to Iraq and Afghanistan, will perform at 8 p.m. Aug. 26 the Wells Fargo Center for the Arts, 50 Mark West Springs Road, Santa Rosa.

If you haven’t heard or seen her before, here are sample one-liners from her online videos:

On the cost of stabilizing Afghanistan:
“How much would it cost to fix the moon? And that’s without mean moon people throwing things at you.”

On the the US military building schools, hospitals and roads in Afghanistan:
“When we’re done there, we should invade Detroit.”

On meth labs:
“I would never do a drug that involved rednecks and science.”

Admission: $30.

Information: 546-3600, wellsfargocenterarts.org.